>A few days ago I was having some work done at my local garage.
A blonde >
came in and asked for a seven-hundred-ten.
We all looked at each other >and another customer asked, "What is a seven-hundred-ten?"
She replied, >"You know, the little piece in the middle of the engine, I have lost it >and need a new one.."
She replied that she did not know exactly what it >was, but this piece had always been there. The mechanic gave her a piece >of paper and a pen and asked her to draw what the piece looked like. She >drew a circle and in the middle of it wrote 710.
He then took her over >to another car which had its hood up and asked "is there a 710 on this >car?"
She pointed and said, "Of course, its right there." If you're not
>sure what a 710 is Click Here
<http://www.hotautoweb.com/cogifs/710.jpg>

YOU CAN LAUGH NOW!!!! I AM!!!! YOUR OLD GRAND PA!!

ONE FOR THE GALS!!! (laughing)

READ THIS ONE LADIES~~~~~~AND YOU TO ~~ MEN!!!!!
Oil Change instructions for Women:

1) Pull up to Jiffy Lube when the mileage reaches 3000 miles since the last oil change..
2) Drink a cup of coffee
3) 15 minutes later, write a check and leave with a properly maintained vehicle.
Money spent:Oil Change: $20.00Coffee: $1.00Total: $21.00
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Oil Change instructions for Men :
1) Wait until Saturday, drive to auto parts store and buy a case of oil, filter, kitty litter, hand cleaner and a scented tree, write a check for $50.00.
2) Stop by 7/11 and buy a case of beer, write a check for $20, drive home.
3) Open a beer and drink it.
4) Jack car up. Spend 30 minutes looking for jack stands.
5) Find jack stands under kid's pedal car.
6) In frustration, open another beer and drink it.
7) Place drain pan under engine.
8) Look for 9/16 box end wrench
.9) Give up and use crescent wrench.
10) Unscrew drain plug.
11) Drop drain plug in pan of hot oil: splash hot oil on you in process. Cuss..
12) Crawl out from under car to wipe hot oil off of face and arms. Throw kitty litter on spilled oil.
13) Have another beer while watching oil drain.
14) Spend 30 minutes looking for oil filter wrench.
15) Give up; crawl under car and hammer a screwdriver through oil filter and twist off.
16) Crawl out from under car with dripping oil filter splashing oil everywhere from holes. Cleverly hide old oil filter among trash in trash can to avoid environmental penalties. Drink a beer.
17) Install new oil filter making sure to apply a thin coat of oil to gasket surface.
18) Dump first quart of fresh oil into engine.
19) Remember drain plug from step 11.
20) Hurry to find drain plug in drain pan.
21) Drink beer.
22) Discover that first quart of fresh oil is now on the floor. Throw kitty litter on oil spill.
23) Get drain plug back in with only a minor spill.
Drink beer.
24) Crawl under car getting kitty litter into eyes. Wipe eyes with oily rag used to clean drain plug. Slip with stupid crescent wrench tightening drain plug and bang knuckles on frame removing any excess skin between knuckles and frame.
25) Begin cussing fit.
26) Throw stupid crescent wrench.
27) Cuss for additional 5 minutes because wrench hit bowling trophy.
28) Beer.
29) Clean up hands and bandage as required to stop blood flow.
30) Beer.
31) Dump in five fresh quarts of oil.
32) Beer.
33) Lower car from jack stands..
34) Move car back to apply more kitty litter to fresh oil spilled during any missed steps.
35) Beer.
36) Test drive car.
37) Get pulled over: arrested for driving under the influence.
38) Car gets impounded.
39) Call loving wife, make bail.
40) 12 hours later, get car from impound yard.Money spent:Parts: $50.00DUI: $2500.00Impound fee: $75.00 Bail: $1500.00Beer: $20.00Total: $4,145.00 But you know the job was done right!
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SEND THIS TO WOMEN WHO NEED A LAUGH......AND TO MEN YOU THINK CAN HANDLE IT..... COME ON NOW !!!!! THIS IS WORTH A BIG LAUGH!!!! RIGHT GUYS????
FROM YOUR OLD GRANDPA,,,AND FRAN!!!!!